For all we like to label some of our actions “good” and some of our actions “bad,” and treat ourselves accordingly, by berating ourselves or mentally beating ourselves up, this negative self-talk highlights a need to strike a peaceful balance within ourselves.
For example, perhaps we are stubborn. This can cause conflict and painful feedback from a loved one, but that same stubbornness can also make us persevere in the face of adversity, or finish projects no one thought we would accomplish.
We often find ourselves nitpicking or disliking aspects of our personalities that could be embraced. After all, struggle only creates pain; acceptance leads to peace and the possibility for change. Stubbornness can be as good as it is bad, if you let it. But if we accept it and become aware of it, we can change it by being aware of when we are being unduly stubborn with loved ones and modify that behavior. If we are too busy being hard on ourselves, we cannot enact that peaceful change.
Rather than label ourselves “good” or “bad,” why not see the reasoning and worth behind our actions? Why not validate ourselves, or seek paths to change, and then move forward in self-forgiveness? Why always get angry with ourselves? We grow stronger when we accept rather than fight and dislike ourselves. With acceptance comes the power of both self-love and the ability to change.
Successful change is not possible in a negative emotional state. Likewise, recovery from mental health issues is not possible until we learn to nurture and accept the self. Only with self-acceptance and love can we take responsibility for our actions while nurturing the self.
If we strip down the labels we have placed on our thoughts and behaviors and search for understanding, we can begin to be gentler with ourselves. With self-love and self-respect, women gain a mantle of courage and strength that provides indomitable protection and enables them to take charge of their lives.
When we understand and act gently to ourselves, we can refine our actions and tailor them to support happiness and continued mental wellness. We can live lives of inner peace rather than turmoil.