Don’t judge somebody who takes their life
It has taken me many years to be able to talk about this and it took my mother many years to tell me what happened.
As a young child my mother told us our father had had a shooting accident. There was no reason to question her. As I got older I wanted to know more about it and really did not know the full truth until I was 30.
My father had taken his life under the influence of alcohol after a disappointment. A young man with a lovely wife and a family of young children.
He could not have possible thought of what that was going to mean for everybody else that was left alive after the event.
I have often wondered what his state of mind was when that took place as I look at the photo’s of this happy handsome man. Things happen to people that simple make them feel hopeless and depressed. When a person gets into that mind spinning place they just cannot manage the feeling it has generated so it makes then just want to sleep. To just escape from the racing thoughts that seem to have so much fear attached to them.
When a person feels this way and even expresses it please know it is serious.
Today it is very easy to die. Many people know they are unwell and get help from a doctor to try to stabilize the mood. The trouble is people start adjusting their medications, some have prescriptions for several doctors each not knowing that several doctors are being seen.
When the feeling becomes overwhelming it is easy to just take too much. However when it’s over it’s over and there is no coming back.
I have known very lovely and wonderful people who have just become that overwhelmed with hopelessness that the only option they could see was to take this course. If only they could have got the help they needed to be processed and helped to have what had become distorted thinking moved to another emotionally healthy place.
Nobody can ever know what is going on in somebody’s mind when this happens or could have thought they would actually go through with it. The guilt and shame that is left for others afterwards can lead them to becoming ill also.
If you are feeling this way please reach out for help. It is usually a combination of events and experiences that have happened that have led to this deep depression, some things are almost impossible for you to talk about. By taking time out and being in a safe place you can find the opportunity ant the tools to move forward. For many of our sad losses if they had had the clinical help they had needed things could have been very different.
For me today I believe my father was a wonderful man who for whatever reason had become lost and in his lostness just reacted. I do not believe he is less a person because of what happened. I just want other lost people to know that they can get the help they need to rebuild their self esteem and confidence and to process trauma and events that are just leaving them emotionally dead.
For me I have come to an acceptance that this was not an act of abandonment or rejection or a statement of not loving me. At that moment he was just not able to love himself.
Please, if you hear anybody you are close to speaking in a way that indicates they may take their life. Get them to a safe place immediately.SubscribeBlinklistBloglinesBlogmarksDiggdel.icio.usFacebookFurlNewsVineRedditStumbleUponTechnorati